Experience:75mg Ketamine (insufflated) - Wandering through the winter night

I always wanted to try some psychedelics, but due to the scarcity of the resources in our country I haven’t been able to. LSD, mushrooms, whatever, I would try it if I would have the opportunity. In the past I tried almost every benzodiazepine you can name, opiates and opioids, gabapentinoids, etc. But, I got access to some pharma-grade S-isomer ketamine (esketamine), the real deal, pure stuff straight out of the factory. The best stuff you could possibly get.

I decided to try it out, straight out of curiosity. I’m 22 years old, 1.87 m of height and body mass of approximately 80 kg. I have extensive knowledge about drugs as I’m in healthcare, so I knew what to expect with ketamine, what are the risks and possible complications. Despite that I studied it in depth, I read a lot of experiences, studied the route of administration, and decided to try it by insufflating the crystals. I opened the ampoules, aspirated the contents with a syringe, put the liquid onto the concave bottom of a glass jar and put it in front of an infrared heating panel to vaporize the liquid, so the crystals would form on the glass bottom. It took a few hours for the liquid to evaporate and the crystals to form on the glass, maybe 5-6 hours in total. Beautiful, long shards, unusually long, from the pictures on the web they looked much smaller, but that may be because of the purity. Nevermind; I scraped the crystals off the glass with a scalpel to get everything off it, and cut it up with the scalpel into fine powder. I had 2 piles of powder, one was 25 mg, and the other was 50 mg (because I had two ampoules, one with 25 and the other with 50 mg), which I also split into two 25 mg lines. For snorting, I cut off the ends of a 1 ml syringe to have a clean, smooth inner surface and a smooth opening to snort all of it effectively.

I blew my nose, cleaned it with Q-tips to clear out the mucosa and allow for the best intake. It was a calm night, everyone in the house was sleeping, I was the only one awake in the house. Exactly at midnight, I snorted up 25 mg. It burned like a motherfucker, but it passed after a few minutes. I turned off the lights and laid in the bed, waiting excited and a little bit anxious for the effects to come up, meanwhile browsing through the internet on my phone. At around T+00.10 I could feel some strange tension, tingling in my head, and maybe a bit of numbness in my mouth and on my lips, alongside with ringing in my ears. At T+00.20 I tried to write something onto a piece of paper, and the time was going slow, very, very slow. My movements were also very slowed down, like in slow-motion clips. I looked at some text on a bottle of water, and I couldn’t focus on the text no matter what I did or how hard I squinted. It felt like it took me half an hour to read the entire label on the bottle, but only 10 minutes passed. I decided to redose with another 25 mg after T+00.30. Here is when the fun part begins. It hit me quite good after T+00.50, 20 min after redosing, with the tingling intensifying, ringing in my ears persisting, and the numbness extending to my arms, hands and legs. It began to cut me off reality, into my own personal world. I wanted to intensify the effects, so I barely managed to use my legs to stand up. I could still manage to stand, with minor difficulties in balance and strange sensations in my feet, like I was walking on crude gravel. I snorted another 25 mg after T+01.10, and here comes the time where I was completely cut off my body.

I don’t remember whether I took my phone in my hands and read some text on it, or what the hell I did, but I couldn’t move at all. Maybe I could lift my arms a little bit, but they were light like feathers. I don’t have a clue after how much time it cut me off, I only remember that I was staring into the ceiling like a cadaver, with my eyes and mouth wide open. I don’t recall the breathing speed and depth, but it was significantly slowed down from my usual rate and depth, although not down to a critical level where it could be dangerous for my health. Then I drifted off into my mind, the vision was swirling like a wave, coming from my right side of the view field, and all of a sudden, I was on a field, covered in snow, with myself in shorts and a t-shirt in the center of it. I wasn’t cold, it was quite pleasantly warm, maybe because I was covered with a blanket as I was lying in my bed. The full moon was shining brightly, the snow was not falling, it was a calm winter night with not a single soul around me, except for myself. I walked through the field, and then suddenly, I realized that I could climb through the air, like I would on a staircase, like there were invisible stairs. Suddenly when I stepped onto the final stair on the top, there wasn’t one. I thought I fell, but I was floating in the air, I could fly. My arms and legs felt like they were floating, like someone lifted and held them in the air, gently caressed them in a slow, massaging manner. I flew to my weekend house, where I laid down under a blossoming cherry which was on a slightly steep hill, full of small white flowers, which were enlightened in the moonlight. I laid down into the snow, which was covering the hill and enjoyed the moment of pure bliss and happiness. I laughed in pure joy, my chest was warm, just like when you’re in love with the perfect girl you’ve ever wanted.

While I was enjoying the moment for what seemed like hours, but in fact only 30 min passed, I was engulfed in a slight panic attack. Because of the sheer beautifulness of the surroundings, of the scenery, I thought that I was in some sort of heaven. The best feeling, surrounded with elements of a perfect environment, the most complete dream I ever had.

I genuinely thought that I had died. The fear that my parents would find me in the morning on the bed stone cold and dead engulfed me, and I forced myself to “wake up” from this dream-like state, and there I was, back inside my room, staring in the ceiling, with my mouth dry as the desert from Sahara and blurry vision. My arms and legs started to regain feeling and “consciousness” as the effects wore off. The panic attack quickly wore off. The tingling inside my head and ringing inside my ears persisted until I went to sleep. The whole experience with myself floating around the winter scenery and laying in the snow under the cherry lasted for about 30-40 minutes. The experience with ketamine was one of the best things that I could experience to this day of my life. I realized how close we are to death, how easy it is for us to achieve the ultimate bliss in our lives, how much we should appreciate and cherish every day that we’re given every morning that we wake up.

Ketamine can give you an amazing experience with your imagination, as it opens endless possibilities that you can experience with your mind. It cut my mind and soul off my body, and allowed it to enjoy the imagery that it contained inside it, but it couldn’t make it “happen” because of all the sensory feedback from my body that was flushed inside my brain. It was an unforgettable experience which I’ll attempt to recreate, or better said: Ket, I’ll be back!

Submitted by DiscoGoat