Groovehunter

Trip report summer'98 -

Substance: 2 doses (paper) LSD, one hour later 2 pills Ecstasy

Quick notes, how it went:

The I and the mind got expanded to the whole cosmos, and I became the cosmos, so I was simply a pair of eyes staring into space, just one window of the cosmos being aware of itself, by chance through the eyes of that one being, a human, lying there on the beach of a random continent; I got aware of the laws of physics, astrophysics , the kepler laws how planets move in their orbits around the sun and I understood those laws intuitively, while remaining at the same time in rational consciousness (which is usual tripping). - TBC - maybe this can also be named sort of a cognitive effect.

Cognitive Effect: Level of vegetative consciousness

This effect is about "becoming a plant", this means your attention and awareness can go and stay at the level on which the world of fauna is based, mainly, It is about growing, expanding, sensory feeling of obstacle (in the ground), overcome it or not, take another way around it, and it is about the basic "feeling" of being alive; Being alive with no sense of emotions, no good nor bad, nothing like fear and happiness. Just the organic thing, being rooted somewhere - TBC - for now what I am able to phrase as a non native english person

This could go on with

Level of animal consciousness

This effect is about shifting one's awareness to that stage, to the level on which one's animal functions are concerned. So what does that mean? For example all functions of being's time awareness and self consciousness are masked; The experiencing person ist solely an animal with its awareness of basic feelings without any timely extended mind consctruct. So if there is danger around you, you can hear, like not recognizable sounds (i.e. engines) you experience exactly that kind of fear, an animal would have. An example are fish who feel/hear ships with combustion engines, they will experience an ongoing fear; at the same time they steadily forget about the fear some seconds ago, so this is in no way traumatizing as it would be for humans. But they also cannot reflect about it; Cannot compare it to sth they learned before, and so on.

Cognitive or transpersonal effect: Being the chosen one

In case of experiencing a stage of Unity and interconnectedness and also a Spirituality enhancement one might become a glimpse of a vision what the mission for one's life might be; Combined with a experience of deity mysticism (level of consciousness described by Ken Wilber ), an experience of god, so to speak, one gets the impression to be the chosen one. The importance of this personal feeling cannot in any way overestimated; It is like other experiences ineffable to others who did not experience a similar state. As this effect has a transforming power for one's further life and serves with profound will power to overcome any obstacles it is in the same time a tightrope walk to the pathological peculiarity of Grandiose delusions [1] An interpretation would be, that this sort of experience is theoretically available to everybody and it is generally not false as humans are the species in creation which is make in God's own likeness (but here the metaphysical area is touched, which is very problematically in an encyclopedian site like psychonautwiki at this time.)

Long term spiritual learning

Spiritual or transpersonal effects, based on cognitive effects can be overwhelming and very difficult to integrate (TODO harm reduction article to psychosis and stuff).

An interpretation, which would be named metaphysics by many people : Is there a way to approach the spiritual world in a scientific way? In short, there were several groups or individuals to do that approach and here for the author the superior way is Anthroposophy by Rudolf Steiner, founded in the beginning of last century.

To go the way into the spiritual realm of man's consciousness abilities it is required to strengthen one's mind's and soul' skills by practicing for a long time; Exercises to strengthen will power, compassion, equanimity and much more.

In case this is not done or much too little, on taking psychedelics in a certain setting (probably kinda high social deprivation), results in deep experiences of spiritual realm which are subject of misinterpretation. These interpretations, which hardly can be communicated with anyone of the outer world, of a real and based social environment might lead to an ongoing delusion.

Delusions and ongoing issues in non-integration, or let's phrase it: missing approaches integrating those will lead to a lonely, isolated way of life; When one meets only people with similar non-based but flying ideas and forgets about old friends and non-integrated problems with relationships, former partners, parents, and so on. All these life style leads to emerging psychotic episodes if all that peaks.

From that point it is not far to psychiatric conditions or in case they can be avoided, to long hard work from basic on; Which can be biased somehow.

... TBC

Long term effects

These are the effects I would say they stay long term in my life of psychedelic transformation

Cognitive Effects - Enhancements

• Creativity enhancement - over time i found myself to be creative with various ways, especially performance, comedy, writing, doing music, also painting;
• Emotion enhancement - tbd
• Dream potentiation - huge amount of lucid dreams, and due to my not neurotypical condition ( narcoleptic diagnosis at age of 17) I sleep several times of the day and my dreams mostly relate to what I experienced in the hours before.
• Empathy, affection and sociability enhancement - feeling compassionate to all humans, this became so "normal" that I am usually not aware anymore
• Increased sense of humor - an awareness of being able to make situation based humourous statements to lift level of spirit; But when my own energy level is low, when I lost self confidence this results in an addiction of making jokes which my beloved humans find annoying. There is also a condition or diagnosis for that ( in german called "Witzelsucht" )
• tbc

Novel

• I found that at time before the transformation I was much more into spatial orientation; Nowadays I must trust more in my intuition and that I find my way through the city based on spontaneous decisions. ("Spatial disorientation")

• As a result of peak experiences at times when I was not yet personal and spiritual matured, I experienced certain effects, like Depersonalization, Derealization, psychotic states, panic attacks, . But mostly in an amount I could find the power and self esteem to handle it and pass through them.

-----

Bookmarks

• Transformations
• Transpersonal effects
• Psychological effects
• Spirituality enhancement
• Spiritual states
• Existential self-realization